Me, myself and aileen

The blog I had before this was supposed to be the last and the best, that’s why I had to look for the best write-up that can specifically express my belief, at least in terms of looking for the best partner.

But talking to my bestfriend Imee today I realized that I should start writing again, if only for that one fan I have in her *thank you sis! I do miss you*

So I sort of scribbled some words and here it goes:

• Loneliness is loneliest moments after being with someone whom your heart desires but not desires yours.
• Happiness is happiest when you’re facing a little kid smiling the sweetest smile the world could ever give.
• Listening is only when you feel the other person’s mumblings of words, otherwise, it’s only hearing and making sure your ears are working.
• Speaking is only when the words that comes out of your mouth comes from within, otherwise, it’s nothing but unnecessary talks.
• The mind is logical enough to tell the heart to stop feeling a certain emotions for practical reasons, and yes, love can be practical, or should I say, should be practical.
• We should be courageous enough to stop hoping and praying for that someone whom we know from the very start will never be more that our friend. (sisters :p).

I miss writing, but the right words comes to me only in deep moments, that is, when I’m either inspired or depressed.

I’m just glad that it’s the first.

In a brief conversation, a man, speaking to a woman, was out to pursue the question, "What kind of man are you looking for?"

She sat quietly for a moment before looking him in the eye and asked, "Do you really want to know?"

Reluctantly, he said, "Yes" as she began to expound…

"As a woman in this day and age, I am in a position to ask a man what he can do for me that I can’t do for myself.

I pay my own bills.

I take care of my household without the help of any man. I am in the position to ask, ‘What can you bring to the table?’"

The man looked at her. Clearly he thought that she was referring to money.

She quickly corrected his thought and stated, "I am not referring to money… I need something more. I need a man who is striving for perfection in every aspect of life."

He sat back in his chair, folded his arms, and asked her to explain.

She said, "I am looking for someone who is striving for perfection Mentally. I need conversation and mental stimulation. I don’t need a simple-minded man.

I am looking for someone who is striving for perfection Spiritually because I don’t need to be unequally yoked… Believers mixed with unbelievers is a recipe for disaster.

I need a man who is striving for perfection Financially because I don’t need a financial… burden.

I am looking for someone who is Sensitive enough to understand what I go through as a woman, but Strong enough to keep me grounded.

God made woman to be a helpmate for man. At this point, I can’t help a man if he can’t help himself."

When she finished her spill, she looked at him. He sat there with a puzzled look on his face, and exclaimed, "You’re asking for a whole lot!"

To which she gracefully replied…

"Only if you think I’m not WORTH a lot."

2006 will always be one of the most memorable year in my life mainly because of the extravagant blessings I received and still receiving (Thank you Lord!). It has been a year of many firsts. God had shown me how faithful He is and has always been!

Still, I feel the need to kick off my 2007 with new outlook, priorities, attitude and maybe, just maybe, a new perspective in life, especially the  matters of the heart. Yes, I have decided to get rid of those emotions that has been haunting me for the past few years. I guess I have never been this focused and decisive with this certain aspect in my life. Of course this will not come without a few tears, but what the heck, I’ve always been a tear jerk

Blessed…

I guess that’s how I would best described this year for me. There were many "firsts" that happened in my life that I just cannot ignore, and if I started listing them down, this page may not be enough =) so I’ll just mention a few:

first trip out of the philippines

one of my "50 things to do" is to go out of the country but I was never keen on working abroad, but when the opportunity to work abroad presented itself to me, I was overwhelmed, not only by the financial rewards but by the many career opportunity that goes hand in hand. It also allowed me to revisit my life plans and make it more feasible than ever.

first full SFC service

because of the social and geographical advantage, I was able to focus more on my service to SFC. I have never been active and have never been this committed to the many responsibilities that was given to me. This helped me get through the many lonely days I would have experienced had I not been busy serving HIM. Ang galing no?

first mp3, laptop, digital camera

I love music and I love taking pictures. I have never imagined myself being able to buy these things but I had. Thank you Lord!

first "shopping galore"

my shopping capabilities has never been this capable =)

first leisure trip (thailand, indonesia)

also included in my "50" list is to be able to go on a leisure trip abroad. And I did, to bintan and bangkok.

last first…

I have to admit, I have never been financially blessed =) both for me and my family. And my mom has never been this worry-less (not that she doesn’t worry anymore because she still do, but at least on that aspect, I was able to lessen her concerns =) Galing talaga ni Lord!!!

Oppressions

The big "O"

Just when I thought that this is going to be a walk in the park, I was wrong.

And I need to be reminded once again because of my tendency to be complacent.

I guess I need these kinds of situations.

To help me feel the need for God’s grace and be reminded that this is not about me but about His plan.

I am a nothing but an instrument.

If only action is as easy as writing these words.

It’s friday night and not surprisingly I’m in the house alone, doing my laundry, just finished watching Ice Princess from Star Movies and browsing the internet with Celine Dion’s "Because You Loved Me" on the background.

Yup, this is my idea of a friday night though I should have gone to our SFC teaching night, but this past two weeks has been too stressful for me and my audit team mates (with the Closing meeting and finalization of fieldwork),  most especially this day, the day we’ve all been waiting for because we got an approval to take Monday off as Tuesday is a holiday, so it’s gonna be a four-day weekend for us! Yey!!!

I have to say that I never enjoyed an audit engagement as much as I did these past two weeks. Our audit team just rock!!! It’s just 5 auditors enjoying each others company by making fun out of each other while trying to beat the stress out of the tight deadline and of course there’s our senior manager who feels like a "dad" making sure that his "little kids" goes straight to Coffee Bean after a Kopitiam lunch…

And I have to mention, we just had a Tony Roma’s feast for lunch today (courtesy of course by our SM).. wow!! I was so full I didn’t even bother to get something for dinner… owww.. I just felt my stomach grumbling and it’s already 11pm

Enough of work though… I miss home… miss Bicol…

Two of my close friends are there and I wish I’m also there especially now because I have a new nephew! Praise God!!! Makes me even more excited to go home in December!!!

Just reminded me to get myself a dress for Lian’s wedding. I have four day weekend to look for it!!!

Galing!

"After years of searching, I have found my soulmate… and it was myself."

(Chicken Soup for the Singles Soul)

initially, I thought, this qoute is not applicable to me I have found my soulmate already, but thinking about it even more, it seemed that I haven’t.

but then again, I am learning to find myself, maybe by that time, I’ll be able to find mine.

i miss my blog…

actually i miss writing… kahit di naman ako magaling…

i miss pouring my thoughts…

I’ve been busy, sa SFC, sa work that I haven’t have time for myself…

so what’s new?

malapit na matapos ang CLP namin sa Holy Trinity Church sa Tampines!!! Praise God for a bountiful harvest. Indeed God humbled me once again by this experience… whatever it was, I’m not ready to pour it in here yet.

been busy sa work… sunod-sunod ang client booking ko, but the best part is that I’m enjoying my work lately… siguro kasi puro documentation… something I know I can be good at and most especially, it’s where my heart is…

personal life… oh well, God allowed me to meet some new boy & girl friends!

nagpunta kami sa Jurong Bird Park nung last weekend

tapos nagpakain kami ng birds sa Lory Loft

yung isa after niya kumain… kasi nasa shoulder ko siya… see picture below:

nag kiss sa lower lip ko…

ang sweet no?

Friday nights had always been my favorite when I was in Manila. Normally, I would look forward seeing friends, dining, drinking coffee, watch movie and laugh until I get teary eyed. But things changed since I got here in merlion park. Now, my idea of a friday night is home, watched TV or do the laundry. I don’t know why and it didn’t bother me at all until tonight.

I went home, watch TV as usual and do some ironing…

I don’t know if there’s anything wrong with me because I seemed to find happiness in my routine. Actually, it’s my way of releasing stress. So maybe I don’t care, after all, nothing in this world is constant. I am bound to change my perspective, maybe earlier than other people… hahaha

tumatanda na talaga ako…